Thoughts stolen from Tobias Fünke

I was listening to a book on tape while driving the other day. It was by David Cross, a comedian and actor from the awesome show Arrested Development. He's really funny and so was the book. Mostly its just him talking about his life or complaining about things that bother him. Two things he mentioned were bathroom attendants and massages. He had certain thoughts about these two things but i too had always been bothered by these two things.

So now i will express my similar feelings on the two subjects.

I'm not sure about a woman's bathrooms but sometimes in fancier restaurants there's a guy sitting in the bathroom to hand you soap and a paper towel. Part of me feels bad for a guy who's job it is to sit in a bathroom and help people wash their hands. So sometimes i tip him out of, well i guess pity?? But most of the time i hate going in there because i don't feel like tipping a guy for handing me a paper towel. It's not like when i'm in a bathroom at Denny's i think "man ... do i have to walk all the way over there then rip off my own paper towel to dry my hands ... i sure wish there was a guy here that would do it for me." In fact i would prefer it if he weren't there. It's awkward 100% of the time. There's just some things you would rather do all on your own. Like go to the bathroom.

Now as for massages. This seems like it's just for rich people that have too much time and money. Aside from athletes to recover from a game or something. I'm sure you feel great after some sort of 2 hour deep tissue massage but if going to the bathroom with a guy sitting on a stool behind you is awkward this has to be ten times worse. I just picture a woman in California with her daily schedule of buying expensive coffee, driving around in her Mercedes, $200 massage, shopping, then stopping at the country club for drinks. And talking to her friends about how hectic her day was. Then again i've never had one. So maybe i'm really missing out.